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I am a 22 year old
black female and I am truly a living testimony.I am so thankful that GOD
has given me a second chance. I've ben through it all ,sexual abuse,physical
abuse, mental abuse and drug abuse. I have three children with two different
fathers. My life was going good until me and my second baby's father split
up. I had to let my mother keep my children for a while until I got on
my feat.I met this guy he was everything a girl could dream of tall dark
and handsome. I felt like he swept me of my feet.I would do anything for
him. I was so lost that the man flat out told me that he slepted with
alot of women.We used condoms most of the time, but on several occassion
condoms were not used. For the whole year I had sex with 10 men unprotected
.I had two bumps under my armpits didnt pay it any mind because I didnt
know what it was because I felt fine.I moved out of town started popping
extasy pills,drinking stripping,and prostituting. My life was beginning
to spin out of control. I felt like no one cared about me. God did'nt
love me. I was all alone with no purpose.On top of that I was being physically
abused by my common law husband. Missing my children I came home only
to try to get my life right and get them back.Little did I know I was
the talk of the town. Everybody knew what I was doing. People was going
around saying that I had AIDS behind my back. They TOLD ME that the guy
that I was talking to had AIDS. But really they were saying I had it.It
had me so paranoid because I never really thought about it until they
said something. I could'nt eat, sleep,or,think. The same night they told
me that I woke up soaking wet. A couple days after that I got a mild fever
swets and the chills. And I remember when I was living out of town after
having unprotected oral and sexual intercourse. I woke up with a sore
throat for a couple weeks straight. I had lost some wieght only because
I was starving myself to lose it. I tried to gain it back but still have'tn
to this day. I lost my appettite. Started looking in my mouth and notice
some bumps in the back of my throat. I was so afraid. I had this sick
feeling in my stomache.I also had muscale aches. I was so worried that
I lived on the computer reading the same signs and symptoms of aids everyday
trying to diagnose myself. Finally I convinced myself to take th test
cuz If Im dying I might as well attempt to stay healthy as long as possible.
All I did was pray that God would give me a second chance that whole week.
I told myself that If it came out positive that I am special and God wants
me to come on home.The results came out to be negative and I only have
God to thank. I promise not to let him down. PRAYER is the key BELIEVE!
God wanted to show me how preciouse life is. And now I see! For the people
out there who test positve all you have to do is pray and have the will
to live and you'll be okay.But if all else fails remember that God's calling
you,and when you leave here your going to a better place.
Sent via Email November
4, 2005 from Texas, USA.
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