This story is for my brother who was diagnosed HIV+ April 5,2004. I am still in total shock and for some reason it seems as if I am taking this worse than he is. Which I know is crazy but, I guess people deal with things in different ways. I cried for two days straight making myself sick. Just thinking and thinking about what the future is going to be like for not only him, but me and my family. My brother has always been very open about his sexuality and it has never been a problem. I love him regardless!!!! Growing up was very hard for him, this coming from his yonger sister. I look back and see how ugly and hurtful people can be for no reason at all except for ignorance. People are afraid of anything that they do not know about. Being a teenager was hard enough. Trying to find your own identity when you know your different than everyone else. He tried for a long time just to fit in making himself unhappy to please other people. I honestly believe that being a gay man especially they put themselves at risk more because they feel they are notworthy. Society still can not see that everyone is not alike.That what makes us who we are. My brother is a wonderful person. What does what he do in the privacy of his own home matter? Who is anyone to say what is wrong or right. We all live in sin and God died for all of us not for just some. I feel everyone needs someone and if you have someone who is HIV+ in your family or even a close friend this is the time to show them you love and care for them. Everyone makes bad choices, but we have to pick up the pieces and move on. I want my brother to know that I will be right by his side through what ever may come his way. People with this virus need to live their lives to the fullest. Don't think of it as your life is already over,think that it has just begun. I have good days and I have bad, but I pull myself togeather for him to see that it's ok. The only message that I want to send is that this diease is preventable. Love yourself and try not to worry about what other people think andfeel. There is always someone in the world that loves you and is glad that your alive!! HIV means something personal to me now where as before it was someting I heard and read about. It's hard to tell someone who knows that they have HIV not to dwell and the fact that one day they might become ill, live for today it's all any of us have. Make what you have the happiest you can! From someone in Texas who truely cares and understands!

Sent via Email Wenesday April 28, 2004 from EL PASO,TX.